I’ve spent weeks thinking about how to express my concerns over Harry Woodgate’s award-winning book, Grandad’s Pride, written for children with a reading age of 3+ (Amazon US) or 4+ (Amazon UK). I’ve pored over it, trying to see it through different eyes, asking myself why I think it’s so inappropriate for the advertised age groups. Every time, my anxieties proliferate. What has happened to our culture that this book has been welcomed with such enthusiasm by the literary establishment—though less so from some of the reviewers on Amazon, Mumsnet and elsewhere?
I’ve already posted a one-star review on Amazon, as has pioneering gay activist Brendan Mooney, who shares these concerns. I’ve also been interested to note that members of the trans community are circulating a petition asking Peter Tatchell to stop speaking in their name, and citing concerns about him being on record as an apologist for sexual relationships between under-age youngsters and adults. My concern here is the appropriation of LGBT activism to give respectability to a book that sexualises children and acts as a form of ideological indoctrination of pre-school children in ways that I regard as utterly inappropriate and indeed dangerous.
I have more to say, but for now I’m posting here a lengthy comment I tried to post on Facebook, in response to someone who accused me of homophobia. The comment was removed:
Here is the comment in full. Thankfully, I had cut and pasted it before it was removed, because I could see it was taking time to post. I’ve also added some images and links here that were not in the Facebook post, but I haven’t edited the wording. That means it’s written spontaneously without the care I would normally take when posting in Substack, so yes, I risk causing further offence by not filtering this post through the many readings I would normally do before sharing. But here goes:
Facebook comment:
For those who defend this book without having read it and thought about the content, my criticisms have nothing to do with sexual orientation. I would be equally critical if the snogging couple in bondage gear were a heterosexual couple. (And interestingly, this image in the US edition has been sanitised for the UK edition, which suggests the editors are well aware of the risk of offence).
US edition (left) and UK edition (right)
Good parents don’t behave that way in front of their children for good reason. So here is what you might not notice if you prefer to keep your adult blindfold on while you read, or if you’re genuinely unaware of what’s going on in the realm of trans activism—and a lot of people are unaware.
This book does little to promote healthy attitudes of respect for same-sex relationships as an expression of love. It’s a bandwagon for trans ideology that shows pre-school children with signs saying “trans kids are magic” and “trans is beautiful”, and a young person with double mastectomy scars holding a banner saying “out and proud”.
No feminist should be okay with the erasure of the female body implicit in all these images, and especially not with the suggestion that pre-school girls might be encouraged to see their breasts as ugly appendages to be removed when they start to grow, if they decide they were assigned the wrong sex at birth. What happened to our struggles to have the female body liberated from its bondage to abuse and misogyny? I suspect every woman in western culture has gone through a phase of feeling she was assigned the wrong body at birth.
Why should a lovely old gay grandad reminiscing about the early Pride movement and mourning the death of his partner (both of which I regard as healthy themes for a pre-school children’s book if handled appropriately), have a pair of Lolita sunglasses and a Polaroid camera in his chest of memories and souvenirs, with a sign saying “Love is love is love”? In that context, the symbolic significance of a “MAP” propped up against the trunk is profoundly worrying. I think it’s a behind-the-hand snigger by the author for those in the know, and if you’re not in the know, I recommend you visit this website.
Am I being paranoid or buying into conspiracy theories peddled by the Daily Mail—as I’ve recently been accused of? Don’t take my word for it. Here are two somewhat contradictory statements—one by Harry Woodgate and one by the publisher of Grandad’s Pride.
Woodgate referring to his magnificent illustrations (yes, he is a brilliant illustrator), inspired by Italo Calvino’s novel, Invisible Cities: “It allowed me to add a lot of intricate detail and hidden symbolism, which is something I’ve always been drawn to anyway, but it’s reaaaally exaggerated here.”
Here, the BBC reports on the publishers’ response to criticisms similar to mine: “Grandad’s Pride faithfully depicts Pride parades from the past and present, many of which are attended by children. We consider accusations of ‘hidden messages’ to be baseless, deeply offensive and homophobic.”
There is a contradiction going on here.
Wake up people. Of course not all men are groomers or predators, but nearly all groomers and predators are men. The sexual abuse of children has to do with male sexuality, not with whether men are straight or gay. I presume that the old men who groped me when I wasn’t much older than the children in this book were heterosexual. They too used sweet words of love while they were feeling me up. I guess I should just be thankful I wasn’t asked to wear Lolita sunglasses and pose for Polaroid camera shots—though later there was a man with a camera, but by then I was fourteen, so a genuine Lolita.
In posting this, I know that some of my trans friends who have shared their vulnerability and their journey with me might feel hurt, and for that I’m truly sorry. But many of the trans people I know and respect either as personal friends or through social media struggle with what’s being done in their name. Blanket inclusivity cannot cover every adult sexual peccadillo, and the language of love should not be used to mask abusive power and indoctrination of children.
I also want to add an important caveat. Harry Woodgate (they/them) is a brilliant young illustrator with great talent. I am not implying anything about him personally in posting this, but as a reader I offer it as a review of a book authored by him that may or may not intend what I see in it. That is for you, as other readers, to decide.
